tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-489177967394240422024-03-05T04:43:11.209-08:00One Cool NerdNerdom in its natural habitat.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.comBlogger63125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-53694809929073447482010-11-15T19:44:00.000-08:002010-11-15T20:02:46.721-08:00Lost and Found<div style="text-align: justify;">Sometimes in life, we cannot find what we need. We spend a while searching in one place, with no avail, unhappily dealing with the consequences of being there, before moving on to another place, to a similar effect. This routine is <span style="color: rgb(102, 204, 204);font-size:100%;" >tiring</span>, <span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 255);font-size:100%;" >delusional</span>, and, at the end of the day, <span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);">fruit</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">less</span></span>. You cannot look for what you want. No, that's not true. You can look all you want, but the best things you find are the things you find, not up to purpose, but up to<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">chance.</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">happenstance.</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: right;">or maybe <span style="font-style: italic;">fate.</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />This is how we find that <span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">five dollar bill</span> we left in that old skirt. This is how we find that <span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);">something</span> we lost ten years ago. This is how we find our <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">true love</span>.<br /><br />These are the pleasant surprises that make us <span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 0);">happy dance</span> around our room to the music inside of our heads.<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size:85%;">On a related note, today I found the one spot in my ENTIRE ROOM that actually has good Wi-Fi. Happy dance time? Oh, yes.<br /></span></div><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-weight: bold;">Anyone else going to a midnight premiere of Harry Potter 7? Je suis! Anyone else going to be dead tired on Friday? Oui, moi aussi!</div>OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-47340793853472202092010-11-13T12:21:00.001-08:002010-11-13T13:16:36.636-08:00The American High SchoolSomeone told me some time ago that American high schools are lacking in comparison with others in other countries but that our universities are generally superior to others'. I wish I could cite this so it would be more than a 'he said, she said' statement, but I don't know where the information came from and don't even remember who told me it. But through my experience in the American high school, I believe that statement is absolutely true.<br /><br />I've read quite a few musings of people questions why the American educational system is so lacking. What I think? The education part really isn't really lacking. Through my thirteen years in my school system, the schools have taught me to subtract and cite, read and research, create and question. I've loved school and, with a few very notable exceptions, I've loved my teachers. Upon reflection, most years, I grew and expanded my knowledge of the world.<br /><br />This is one fact I can cite. Everywhere--in newspapers, news magazines, TV shows, news programs--people are questioning, "Why are American students failing where other countries' students are excelling?" Just search "Failing American Schools" on Google. Only one article on the first page stated that the failure of American schools is a myth. I'm a seventeen year old girl. I don't know what my generation will produce. I don't know what kind of people we'll create and what we'll do when we're adults and what kind of new technologies we'll make. What do I know then?<br /><br />I know last year a classmate of mine (we were sixteen then), asked me what the baby boomers were.<br /><br />Another classmate a month or two later asked another student what Al-Qaeda was.<br /><br />A week or two ago, when Vote 2010 closed, my friends were sitting around looking at the results and what we thought about them. Nobody in this group was any older than eighteen. One boy asked the rest of us, "Why do you care about the government?"<br /><br />This is why American <span style="font-style:italic;">students</span>, not schools, are failing.<br /><br />They are failing because parents don't care to tell their kids about baby boomers (or Social Security and our inability to depend on it) or Al-Qaeda (or its potential affect on their world and its inhabitants) or the importance of the government (and how they can effect change through internship even though they are not enfranchised).<br /><br />I'm going to take myself as an example, and please excuse a bit of my vanity in the following words. My mother had the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom in the crucial time before I entered public school. In my house there was music and art and reading and writing - creativity in abundance. The playroom housed a TV, but that's not my most vivid memory of the playroom. With the inner cardboard roll of carpet, we made a totem pole, erected in the very center of the playroom. Around the Fourth of July, fireworks were created out of pom-pom thingys. The only memory I have of the television in that room is me, with a hairbrush, singing to LeAnn Rimes' concert on the TV behind me.<br /><br />I was lucky. I could experience the love of education from my own home. I loved school. I loved learning. I loved my family (They are all connected). Others aren't so lucky, forced to spend their first five years learning from the boob tube. It gets worse, too. Once these deprived souls enter the school systems, they and their parents blame the teachers, blame the curriculum, blame the classmates, blame anything other than the origin of learning: home.<br /><br />Yes, the parents who don't help with homework, don't foster learning and reading can certainly be a factor. But I feel that most of the one hundred students in my class had potential when they entered middle school. This is when the learning stopped.<br /><br />High school and middle school center on the social factor. Pep assemblies, dances, gossip, oh my! Look at any movie about high school. Hannah Montana. Mean Girls. Never Been Kissed. Even the classics. Pretty In Pink. Sixteen Candles. Students fall in love, go to work, go to dances. They do go to school of course. And while in school, they talk so loud between one another you wonder if the teacher is <span style="font-style:italic;">deaf</span>. This is not an exaggeration. High schools are not teaching. In the high school, we spend a great deal of time having fun to 'foster learning,' then teachers wonder why test scores are so low.<br /><br />Not to say that test scores actually reflect the ability of a student. Me and my friend have created a game called the 'French Game' to practice our French vocabulary. It goes like this:<br /><br />Me: la genou (points to knee)<br />Her: la main (holds up hand)<br />Me: la tete (points to head)<br />Her: le chemisier (points to shirt)<br /><br />It goes on like that until one of us runs out of words and the other wins. My friend is very proficient in French. But she gets a D on every test because of test anxiety. She cannot do well in French because she FREAKS OUT on every test. It's not the teacher's fault. It's not her fault. It's the way it is.<br /><br />As a final note (because this has become quite long), I would like to point some blame on teachers. I have had classes where I learned nothing. I have had classes where I taught every body, rather than the teacher teaching (now where's my friggin paycheck???). I have had classes where I was just filling a seat. I have had an entire <span style="font-style:italic;">year</span> where I feel like I could have skipped that year and gone on to the next for all I learned.<br /><br />College in the High School programs--like Running Start in Washington--really help students like me, who spent years learning and want to continue learning. I don't know how to fix faulty teachers or faulty parents and I don't foresee high schools taking the fun out of fundamentals. I'm a seventeen year old girl. I don't know how to fix it.<br /><br />Maybe we can institute a community college-like atmosphere in high school. But would that really work with the student perception of high school?<br /><br />Maybe we can heighten the expectations to get into universities? But would that really do anything other than lessen the possibility for high schools to get more than menial jobs?<br /><br />I don't know what to do. I just know something's gotta change.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-62835063420714569422010-11-11T20:37:00.000-08:002010-11-11T20:47:13.173-08:00Haven't Posted in A Year.Wow. One year, no post. Sad day. I'd just like to say that I completely forgot about this blog. Not that anyone reads it...<br /><br />I decided to write again as of today and plan to add it to my toolbar so maybe I'll blog more often. I want to do more of an article kind of thing with my blog, rather than a "here's my day, let me regurgitate my teenage angst-y feelings to you" diary kind of thing.<br /><br />But I must give you one little diary post.<br /><br />Babysat today. It went pretty well, minus the poopy diaper incident and the missing of the mom incident. He didn't want to go to bed but some rocking in the rocking chair and humming of Rent songs and some cuddling and he went right to sleep. I have a way with the kids. And the Rent songs.<br /><br />"How did we get here? How the hell? Pan left, close on the steeple of the church. How did I get here? How the hell? Christmas! Christmas Eve, last year. How could a night so frozen be so scalding hot? How could a morning so mild be so raw? How, our entire year strewn on the cutting room floor of memory when single frames of one magic night forever flicker in close-up on the 3-D IMAX of my mind? That's poetic! That's pathetic..."<br /><br />....Yeah.<br /><br />Anyway.<br /><br />I've also started the Running Start program - for those of you (I speak as if I have a fan following of any kind! Ha!) non-Washingtonians, Running Start is a program in which you can enroll in community college to get high school credit. Basically, it's twice the homework with the large possibility of your GPA dropping significantly, but I'm trying my best and working on swimming through the large piles of homework that seem to be forever accumulating. I like it, though. I like intellectual challenge.<br /><br />And, clearly, I like physical challenge. I had a killer cross country season this year, PR'ing at 24:33 at one of the hardest courses of the year. I learned that I actually like cross country. Who knew?<br /><br />Okay. I'm going to go do some homework. And buy some Tegan and Sara collab songs. Mostly the latter. :D<br /><br />Night, all.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-58546389724740051442009-11-07T17:16:00.001-08:002009-11-07T17:34:45.531-08:00I'm in a strange mood. One of those sad, bittersweet moods where you think about your life and what it entails and what you wish it would entail and what you're lucky. It started when I started talking to a friend, and that reminded me of another friend who got in a bit of a spot and is now facing jail time. (Don't comment me with questions or comments on that subject - for privacy of all involved, I will not say any more)<br /><br />Basically now I'm thinking about how my life is good but sucks at the same time. It's good because I have such great friends and I like all my classes - excluding one major exception - and basically nothing is wrong. My classes are hard, but I like a challenge. My life requires much homework, but I don't dislike homework. Music has colored my life like I never thought possible (basically there are very few hours of my day not dotted with music; silence is so LOUD). <br /><br />The 'sucks' part is hard to explain and has been enforced by several different occurrences in my life. Part of it is my lack of a boyfriend. I'm the kind of person who never really minds being alone - as much as I love people, there's nothing like sitting alone in your bedroom - but sometimes it gets tiresome. A part of me so wants someone to go do things with on Saturday night and someone to feel my heart ache for when we're apart and someone to kiss on the dance floor during Homecoming. Most of all, I want this person to be someone who I really WANT, not just someone there because. This is my biggest problem.<br /><br />I'm at the moment where I'm so tired of my surroundings. I like my life, but it's too familiar. It's like listening to the same song too many times or running a flat, straight cross country course. I see what's ahead and I see what's behind and I know this turn and that without looking. Not that I don't mind these things. Singing is easy when you know the words. Air-guitaring is simple when you know the exact rhythm. Dancing is perfect when the beats are ingrained into your brain cells. And no hills or turns or roots or jumps makes for a perfect cross country course.<br /><br />I'm happy.<br /><br />I am.<br /><br />It's just too easy.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-35939381266773005072009-08-31T13:28:00.000-07:002009-08-31T13:30:27.541-07:00Baby names...<br /><br />Girl: Imogen, Emmy, Lucy Elaine, Lorelai Katherine<br />Boy: Chandler, Arson, DaveyOneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-5690542942816073622009-08-07T12:57:00.001-07:002009-08-07T13:21:19.964-07:00This is my random blog. I have three things to talk about (although by the end of this blog, I'll probably have talked about five or six) and there is no connection between any of them. Ready...set...GO.<br /><br />One. Anyone who lives in the Pacific Northwest, as I do, will remember that last week we had record highs. On my front porch, it reached 114, which might not seem hot to some people, but to the temperate climate of the northwest, it was freaking HOT. Well, now, I'm looking outside...and it's drizzling. Oh, you've gotta love Washington.<br /><br />Two. I've started sewing. Poorly, and by hand because we don't have a sewing machine, but I have. I plan to post a pic of my creation when it's done. =]<br /><br />Two and a half. I have discovered the secret of losing weight when you just want to lose 20 pounds or less. You need to count calories (lame, yes, but it works), and you need to stop drinking soda, juice, and sweetened tea. This is where half your calories come from, and it's so easy to JUST DRINK WATER. Just saying.<br /><br />Three. Since I did get two reviews on my 'review this blog post and get a story excerpt,' I find it unfair to say that I will not post a story. I don't want to be that kind of bitch. So, if you want it, shoot an email to onecoolnerd@gmail.com and I'll send you one back with the excerpt.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-24679042677127301262009-08-02T16:55:00.000-07:002009-08-02T16:58:19.625-07:00So, the other day, I'm in Lowe's with my mom and we both need to...relieve ourselves. And into the bathroom we go. We do our business, then leave the stalls and are washing our hands when another woman walks in with a cell phone plastered to her ear. She enters a stall...and then keeps talking!!! I'm not saying she tastefully waited for a chance to close the conversation before...you know. NO. She keeps talking, whilst peeing!!!!!!<br /><br />EW.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-7096318741411440292009-07-27T13:37:00.000-07:002009-07-27T13:39:14.283-07:00If three people comment this post, I'll post up a portion of the story I'm writing. Any takers?OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-41399208837801632682009-07-22T21:19:00.000-07:002009-07-22T21:26:47.971-07:00These are times when I wish I could run away; wish I had the gall and the courage. Times when I feel everyone around me is simply ignoring my sorrow, or perhaps I really am that great of an actress. In short, nothing truly is plaguing my soul except the lonesomeness I cannot escape. I feel confined within this home and within this body. I wish I were somewhere else, was someone else. I feel so weak, admitting to this fault of mine, but it's my true feelings and it seems ridiculous to mask these, especially to people who read my blog but otherwise know little of me - with the exception of my friend Cass. I feel like shit, that's all I can say. My life has been diminished to a room, although this is, of course, my own choice. I've spent my summer days watching Gilmore Girls, until I ran out of episodes that I had on DVD, then I turned to online episodes of InuYasha (I found a great free online anime provider). I feel pathetic. I feel lonely. It doesn't matter that I can text people all day if I so choose, it's the fact that that's all I do. Three times today I nearly got in my car and drive away, a crime only because I have yet to possess a license of my own. I just need to get out of this TOWN. I feel so trapped!!!! I'll go with anyone just to leave, even if they're just going to the grocery store or to Target or Home Depot. I - I just want to be with other people.<br /><br />But I guess I'm so pathetic even my so-called 'best friend' turns a cold shoulder to me.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-63305037725880052682009-06-29T14:16:00.001-07:002009-06-29T14:46:25.329-07:00To my future One And Only,I am sixteen years old, and that doesn't seem like a lot. But I think more than I speak, which says something because I speak more than most people would like. And trust me, at sixteen, I've thought long and hard about what I want my husband to look like, act like, and just generally be like. At sixteen, I have no clue if you'll be anything like my imagination, but I intend to detail it precisely right... now.<br /><br />I don't know what you'll look like, but sadly, here lies potentially the most shallow piece of myself. Because I cannot imagine marrying anyone unattractive. Wait - before you think me superficial, please hear me out. "Attractive" is such a broad spectrum to me, because I think Pete Wentz is attractive, but I also think Matthew Perry is attractive (if you just said or thought "Who?" at Matthew Perry it is clear we cannot be together). I drool at Davey Havok and also at Corbin Bleu. "Sexy" holds no boundaries to me. Sexy is African and sexy is Caucasian and sexy is Latino and Native American and Asian and Middle Eastern. Sexy is red-haired and brunnette and black-haired and caramel-colored. Blonde is less sexy than the rest of these. Sexy is gorgeous eyes (I'm particularily partial to green eyes). Sexy is thin and muscular, but sexy is also a little chunky. I imagine a mix of all these things in you. I wonder how many qualities you'll hold?<br /><br />As for your personality, you MUST be open-minded and silly and crazy and spontaneous and a little insane. Please kiss me when we're angry and please make our dates at strange places. Remember what <span style="font-style: italic;">I</span> like, always, because I try to remember what you like. Treat me like a lady, but don't reat me like a delicate flower which cannot do man-things. Please don't text on dates - it's rude. Introduce me to your favorite bands, and love all kinds of music because music is the second-most holy thing on this planet. Speaking of holy things, I want us to share a religion that loves its God whole-heartedly. (And speaking of holey things, I like swiss cheese!) Travel with me, and I don't just mean across the country or to Europe or Asia or Africa or anywhere like that. I want to go there, too, but sometimes I just want to walk. Driving doesn't let you stop and look and see. Let's walk around Seattle, walk around Portland, walk around Forks or Bellingham or Tillamook.<br /><br />I hope you don't like Halo or World of Warcraft, but if you do, well...you're a guy. I hope you're rough, but sweet and sarcastic, but sincere and sensitive. Be a contradiction. I hope you love music like you love breathing and I hope you love Jesus twice as much as you love me. I hope you read. I hope you love to obtain new knowledge and are sad when college ends because it's the end of structured learning and you love that like me. I hope you're tidy and cool-headed and tall and muscular, to compensate for all I am not. I hope when you read this, I am still a virgin and so are you. I hope you pressure me about all the right things and leave all else alone. I hope you'll watch chick flicks with me and love them. I hope you cry at "My Sister's Keeper" and "The Notebook" and "My Best Friend's Wedding" and "The Boy in the Striped Pajamas." When we watch "Dirty Dancing," I hope you hold me while I cry (I also hope you see that I'm not crying because it's really sad, but because I see you and I see Johnny and I worry that could happen to us). I hope you dance in the rain and I hope you sing well. I hope you have passion and love in your heart. I hope you like the rain. I hope we grow old together.<br /><br />Now I'm sad... =[<br /><br />I love you, my Future.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-33922611114494050922009-06-26T15:37:00.000-07:002009-06-26T15:39:39.632-07:00To Maximum Capacity...Yeah, so stupid me, I can't figure out how the hell to send you a message. So I'm going to reply here and hope to hell you check...? Anyways. I'll be updating both semi-frequently. Hopefully, once or twice a week. The other will be mostly one-sentence blog posts.<br /><br />I'd also like to take this moment to beg any reader of this to PLEASE tell your friends. I currently have two lovely, faithful readers, and I thank and love them dearly. But I'd like more. Cuz I'm gready like that. And I can't spell... (greedy not gready...)OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-55760433692609254492009-05-08T19:18:00.000-07:002009-05-08T19:35:20.884-07:00Going to a movie with my brother tonight. We're going to see <span style="font-style: italic;">X-Men Origins</span>. Hopefully I won't need to have remember what happened in the other three (three...yes?) movies, because I totally forgetted. My favorite character was always Rogue. Don't know why. But I always wanted to be her. Just like in <span style="font-style: italic;">Rocket Power</span> I wanted to be Reggie. I wanted to be a tough girl. But alas, I was - and am - a wimp.<br /><br />Which brings me to my first question for the comments: <span style="font-weight: bold;">Who of X-Men is the most rockingest?</span><br /><br />For the second time in the history of this blog, someone I do not know has visited and left a comment! A very nice comment, too. =] I want to thank you, Francois. And you should know that I did check out your blog, too, and it was way rad. Your posts are funny. =] I loved the Mac v. Microsoft one. *coughMacsarebettercoughcough* I really do hope you come back.<br /><br />Changed the background, did you notice? Tried doing that stupid HTML code thing but apparently The Nerd is too inept to do that. I seriously spent two hours trying to figure it out. My brother went for a walk, came back and said, "You're still on that thing?!" I scowled. I actually didn't know there was a way to change the backgrounds from the usual templates. Heh. Smart one, eh?<br /><br />I've been a very infrequent poster lately, but I am willing to change. In fact, I have a business proposition for you: if you invite ONE FRIEND to view my blog, I will blog once a day for a year!<br /><br />New question: <span style="font-weight: bold;">WILL YOU DO THIS FOR ME????</span><br /><br />Finally, I firmly believe Twitter is a waste of time. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Do you tweet?</span><br /><br />In case you need actual instructions: please answer the bold in the comments. Thank you.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-79942565526825830772009-05-07T18:50:00.000-07:002009-05-07T18:51:09.056-07:00So naive....<br /><br />And I thought Hitler was the only one who forced people of a certain race into concentration camps.<br /><br />Roosevelt did it too. Same time, marginally better conditions.<br /><br />So sad.. =[OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-15213319325817524722009-02-18T18:15:00.000-08:002009-02-18T18:19:02.200-08:00How I Know There Is a GodI know God exists when I am going on a vacation for the weekend and see that my online class has few expectations for once in my life.<br /><br />I know God exists when my friend wants to be in a play where rehearsals are Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday...and she works Wednesday and Friday.<br /><br />I know God exists when my shy friend suddenly is bold enough to say, "Decide."<br /><br />I know God exists when my arch enemy sees me crying and asks what's wrong.<br /><br />I know God exists when I see a beautiful day like today.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-56146604731377938902009-02-18T17:20:00.000-08:002009-02-18T17:28:06.337-08:00My Favorite Names<span style="font-weight: bold;">Favorite Guy Names:</span><br />Dimitri<br />William<br />Davey<br />Alexander<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Favorite Girl Names:</span><br />Kathleen<br />Elaine<br />AstridOneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-1966618409413161822009-02-13T22:41:00.000-08:002009-02-13T22:52:43.051-08:00Music Exclusiveness.On my iTunes<br /><br />I have African music and French music.<br />I have German music and Hawaiian music.<br />I have Disney stars and 'explicit content' signs.<br />I have Journey and Jim Croce.<br />I have Paramore and Panic! at the Disco.<br />I have Demi Lovato and Def Leppard.<br />I have Myra and Mirah.<br />I have Tegan and Sara and Meg and Dia and Aly and AJ.<br />I have AFI and Blaqk Audio.<br />I have Blink182 and Angels and Airwaves.<br />I have hip-hop and tribal music.<br />I have swing and rock and pop.<br />I have Christian and country.<br />(In some cases, I have Christian pop, Christian rock, Christian metal and Christian hip-hop)<br />I have music I got for free.<br />I have music I paid for on iTunes.<br />I have music I acquired from Limewire.<br />I have music I wrote and sung myself.<br />I have music my daddy sang himself.<br />I have lullabies and music my grandpa would have an aneurysm if he heard.<br />I have music my friends love.<br />I have music my friends can't stand.<br />I have music I originally hated but then grew to love.<br /><br />I have a very limited musical taste.<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">^^^note sarcasm ^^^</span><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></span>OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-73842578033893982902009-01-18T21:26:00.000-08:002009-01-18T21:39:51.246-08:00I am human.I try very hard to act more mature than what my age group typically does. I usually do not conform to the term 'teenager'. I am not reckless. I am not hormone-driven. I am shy and rational and see past the ways of my peers.<br /><br />But that doesn't mean that I'm not still insecure.<br /><br />I look at other girls and feel fat and ugly and clumsy. Now, I know for one thing I am <span style="font-style: italic;">far</span> from fat, and not really ugly, per se, but I <span style="font-style: italic;">am</span> clumsy. I am not going to even try to defend that one.<br /><br />I am also extremely prone to jealousy. I walk down the halls and see couples coupling and I just kind of feel this annoyance building within...such an annoyance that I really would like to grip their necks in my hands and squeeze the life out of them.<br /><br />Not that I would do this, however. Shy, remember?<br /><br />But, yeah, look close enough at my shoulder and you'll see a little green beast perched there quite frequently. I am jealous of people who can dance. I am jealous of people who are in love, because I haven't figured out how to be that yet. I am jealous of girls who say the right thing, and be the right person.<br /><br />I guess I shouldn't care...No, I really shouldn't. But it is kind of heartbreaking, sometimes, how obvious my faults are.<br /><br />And now, to show what triggered it all. A lame Disney movie. "Another Cinderella Story". I liked it. But this part here made my heart squeeze painfully:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnh9G1VVbhutQbiflMZu_5vWI7G5K_y8WCf7g2yYxWeg-1-MWeDMwnt6IWRwtHGRQ6E5vQunwVWvwIMOnPn7ZvgTCXjtk4ohhEMhiY0udQ9W6SybzFocaZvP7Nl2-VHKYnash69tnfRQA/s1600-h/acs.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 176px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnh9G1VVbhutQbiflMZu_5vWI7G5K_y8WCf7g2yYxWeg-1-MWeDMwnt6IWRwtHGRQ6E5vQunwVWvwIMOnPn7ZvgTCXjtk4ohhEMhiY0udQ9W6SybzFocaZvP7Nl2-VHKYnash69tnfRQA/s320/acs.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5292874989732139714" border="0" /></a><span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="font-style: italic;">(please excuse the Spanish subtitle. I couldn't find the screenshot without it...)</span><br /></span></div>OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-74110572704993292022008-12-21T13:24:00.000-08:002008-12-21T13:25:41.756-08:00BUY MY BOOK!!!!!!!!!!<br /><a href="http://www.lulu.com/commerce/index.php?fBuyContent=5116083"><br /><img src="http://www.lulu.com/services/buy_now_buttons/images/book_blue.gif" border="0" alt="Support independent publishing: buy this book on Lulu." /><br /> </a> <br /><br />Please?OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-73086825654683518162008-12-21T13:19:00.000-08:002008-12-21T13:24:07.186-08:00My Goals<ol><li>Become a famous author</li><li>Meet Davey Havok</li><li>Have two or three kids and name them Davey, Elaine, and...something else</li><li>Go to Western Washington University</li><li>Get out of my hometown</li><li>Get a tattoo on the inside of my left wrist</li><li>Travel the world!!!!!!!</li></ol>OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-54986796802383993492008-12-09T21:10:00.001-08:002008-12-09T21:12:44.703-08:00Treading lightly....I get so tired of treading around eggshells.<br />Walking carefully so that no one is hurt.<br />Lately I've let loose more often; refused to accommodate my feelings for others.<br />And guess what. They don't like me like that.<br />So apparently I've been lying.<br />So apparently I'd have no friends if not for my acting.<br />Too damn bad.<br />I have true friends who stick by my side despite my ruthlessness.<br />I just hate those baby suckers who I have to watch what I say.<br />Only now am I realized the weak skins of some.<br />The tough exteriors of others.<br />And I'm glad I'm learning this now.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-22274297089451283702008-11-26T20:22:00.001-08:002008-11-26T20:24:50.238-08:00I was just wondering if anyone else does this.<br /><br />So my mom bought me a magazine the other day because it had Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson on the front (the costars of <span style="font-style: italic;">Twilight</span> for all you hermits out there). I began reading it from the start, but grew bored and closed it. Today I opened it, starting at the back. I'd read each page starting at the back and going toward the front. When I would look at articles, I'd skip about the page rather than reading methodically left-to-right, top-to-bottom. The same thing happens with lists. I start at the bottom and read to the top. ???<br /><br />So. I was wondering. Anyone else do this? Or do you read other things strangely? Tell me. =]OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-67065157459117077422008-11-18T17:38:00.000-08:002008-11-18T17:43:34.348-08:00>=[Read that article then come back to me.<br /><br /><a href="http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/27706917/?GT1=43001">http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/27706917/?GT1=43001</a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />For all of those who were lazy and did not read it, it talked about girls. And their sex lives. It says that girls, on average, are losing their virginity at age 15. I am 15. I thought that rate was going down? Most girls my age are virgins with no plans of changing that status any time soon. Like me. I want to wait until marriage, for heaven's sake! I want the satisfaction of getting to senior year and being all like, "Oh, what? You guys lost it and now regret it? Well guess what! I still have mine!"<br /><br />I guess it just is appalling to me. At the same time we speak of a woman's strength in today's society, here is this statistic. And it pisses me off because it makes ALL of us look bad! Why ruin an entire banana with one bruise? WHY NOT FREAKING WAIT UNTIL YOU'RE SURE ABOUT EVERYTHING AND YOUR EMOTIONS DO NOT RULE YOU??????????<br /><br />High-schoolers are retards.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-75021429168565578662008-11-17T21:52:00.000-08:002008-11-17T21:56:25.088-08:00What I KnowIn my 10th grade experiences, I've found this.<br /><br />Good friends are not the ones that look cool standing next to you. They are the ones who you trust and who trust you the most.<br /><br />God can be found in the most desperate of situations.<br /><br />Love is unexpected, and harsh.<br /><br />God doesn't ask permission to speak through you. He just does what he feels is best.<br /><br />I am a Lutheran. =]<br /><br />Worship can be wonderfully fulfilling. Especially when alone.<br /><br />Friends do NOT have to share your religion. They're not friends if they ignore you because you love God.<br /><br />And most of all:<br /><br />God loves me through all the idiotic things I do.OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-38084668942187111992008-11-10T21:15:00.000-08:002008-11-10T21:17:48.802-08:00<span style="font-size:85%;">I wonder if anyone can relate to this. =]</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">HIM</span><br /><br />He is there<br />He holds me<br />He loves me unconditionally<br />He cradles me in my darkest hour<br />And holds the finest details of my life.<br />I give it all to Him,<br />Because his plan is positively,<br />Absolutely,<br />For sure<br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">better than mine.</span><br /></div>OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48917796739424042.post-32796741987711774122008-10-26T22:26:00.001-07:002008-10-27T19:46:29.226-07:00WHAT? A CHALLENGE.See how sad and lonely the new banner is? There are just three stick people there.<br /><br />Kay, now, go read the blog below this one. I'll wait.<br /><br />...<br /><br />...<br /><br />...<br /><br />...<br /><br />Done? Good.<br /><br />Do you feel inspired to go do something? GOOD. Do it. Then, send me an email at onecoolnerd@gmail.com and tell me what you want to do, or did. For every email I receive on this topic, I will put another stick figure on the banner. Help me feel every inch of that there banner people! You can do it!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">10.27.08 EDIT:</span> I would like to stress that this 'do something' campaign is not something FOR YOU. It was meant to be a plan to better the community, like the below post mentioned. Those of you who have already submitted a plan, thank you, and I've added your stick figure, however I realized I was not specific in my explanation of what your goal was meant to be, and I'm sorry for that.<br /><br />=]OneCoolNerdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16805819826638850055noreply@blogger.com1